How do I get more matches on dating apps?

Answer by Marni Kinrys Founder, The Wing Girl Method · 3 min read

Short answer

Your matches are low because of (1) your photos — usually the wrong ones, in the wrong order, or too few, (2) your bio — either boring, missing, or trying too hard, and (3) your profile signals — height, age settings, prompts, and voice notes. Fix photos first (biggest lever), then bio, then details. Most men see 3-10x more matches with just a photo overhaul.

Marni's answer

I'm Marni Kinrys, founder of The Wing Girl Method. I've helped thousands of men turn their dating app profiles from dead zones into pipelines. And I'm going to tell you the truth about what actually works — because most men are making the same 3 mistakes over and over.

The truth about dating app matching

Women swipe fast. Really fast. Sometimes 100+ profiles in 10 minutes. So your profile has to communicate 'yes, worth talking to' in about 2 seconds — or you're gone.

And the #1 lever by a wide margin is your PHOTOS. Bio and prompts matter — but if your photos suck, no bio can save you. Photos first, everything else second.

The 6-photo formula that works

1. Lead photo: a clear, well-lit shot of your FACE. Alone. Smiling naturally. This is your foot in the door.

2. Full body shot: shows your build. Real, in normal clothes, not gym selfie.

3. Social proof: you with friends laughing, having fun. Shows you have a life.

4. Doing something interesting: hobby, travel, cooking, playing an instrument, anything that gives her something to react to.

5. With a dog or in an interesting environment: shows warmth or lifestyle.

6. Recent, high-quality: dressed well, real. Not from 5 years ago.

Photo mistakes that destroy your matches

1. All gym selfies. She'll think you have no other identity.

2. Group photos as your lead photo. She has to guess which one is you.

3. Fish photos, car photos, sunglasses in every picture. All red flags.

4. Bathroom mirror shots. Looks unpolished.

5. Photos from 2015. She can tell.

6. Only serious face shots. She wants to see you smile.

The bio in 3 lines

Line 1: Something concrete about your life or what you love. Not a list of adjectives.

Line 2: Something playful or slightly teasing. Shows humor and confidence.

Line 3: What you're looking for or a fun invitation. Gives her a clear next move.

Common mistakes men make

Using all gym or shirtless photos
Group photos as your lead photo
No bio or generic 'love to travel and try new things'
Photos with sunglasses in every shot
Old photos that don't match how you look now

What to do instead

Get professional photos or use natural light and a friend with a phone.
Lead with a clear face shot, smiling naturally.
Write a bio that gives her something specific to comment on.
Add a prompt or two that shows humor and playfulness.
Update your photos every 6 months. Fresh photos rank higher in the algorithm.

Marni's take

Here's the wing-girl truth about dating apps. Women aren't rejecting YOU — they're rejecting your profile. And your profile is 5 photos and 300 characters that don't come close to representing who you actually are. Fix the profile and the matches follow. Then it's about what you SAY once you've matched. But it all starts with photos that show her a real, interesting, confident man she'd want to spend an evening with.

Key takeaways

Photos matter more than everything else combined.
Lead with a clear face shot. Show your face, your body, your life.
Bio in 3 lines — concrete, playful, inviting.
Update photos every 6 months. Fresh photos rank higher.