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First I want to start off with your profile picture.
When I used online dating, I would come across tons of guys who totally turned me off with their profile pictures. Not because they were unattractive in their pictures but because of how overwhelming their pictures were. There were guys on there with 800 pictures of themselves, at all different angles. Some had 12 pictures of their dogs, not standing with them but ALONE. Others had gross pics of them with their possible girlfriend. Why would I ever want to see that? One even had a picture of him getting a lap dance!!!
Let me also note, that I was doing online dating to meet someone. To have a relationship. I was not on there for friendship or one night stands. If I was then I would have been looking with a different eye. But I still know that all of the above would have turned me off!
The truth is that most of these guys had pretty good profiles and had they not totally turned me off with their pictures, I may have dated them.
Pictures are supposed to paint a picture of who you are and what you represent. If you are a dog lover and have a dog, then post ONE PICTURE of you and your dog. Not 4! If you are into motorcycles, great, but show me one picture of you on your bike not 20 different shots of you in a race with a helmet on.
The other important element you should consider is whether or not your picture elicits a sense of trust. Meaning, as a woman, do I trust what I am seeing is real and do I trust that this guy is really for me.
1. Show your trustworthy family! If both of your parents were married for 30 years or more, that is great! If you both have a great relationship with a sibling, that is great, too! If you have happy family photos, you can include them as additional photos in your profile. This embeds you in the world not as an “online guy” but as a genuine human being with a family.
2. Employ trust words. “Family, integrity, real, authentic, no game playing, girl next door, a best friend.” Look at the profiles of women you'd like to meet and identify her trust words. Use the best in your profile, then, when you write her, mirror them back to her if they are authentic to you, too. Remember, there is a fine line between creating rapport honestly and manipulating/fooling a girl to get something from her. It is a GREAT idea to reflect back to her the very words she uses, tradition is onto something when it endows the smile “with the power to attract and fascinate, to stimulate desire.”
3. Show a photo of you with your guy pals doing guy things – on a boat, playing b-ball, painting a room together. NOT sitting around with drinks at a club or bar patio. As I say over and over, positive guy association removes you from the stalker/lone-wolf realm and places you safely into a team of guys, implicitly already trusted by them.
4. Show a photo of you with gal pals. Not a gal pal, but some, in a social setting. If you put on a photo of you with a former girlfriend, now you've created a story they are going to want you to explain – you've lit up her imagination. But in the wrong direction. Avoid the trouble. The image – the fantasy – you are constructing the group-gal pal photo is that you are TRUSTED by other women. That they like and trust you but that you have been clearly saving yourself for right now – for this woman looking at you from the other end of the fiber optic cable.
5. Extra points! Have those gal pals be as attractive as the level of girl you are searching for. If you use them honestly.
6. Smile! You don't have to show teeth. But give up on the sunglasses resting low on the bridge of the nose, side-glance thing. It's very Disco Stu and it does not create trust. A nice open smile sets off a whole series of neuro-chemical reactions in the viewer. For example, a Buddha smile immediately communicates peace and tranquility. Trustworthy.
According to Angus Trumble, in his weirdly interesting book, A Brief History of the Smile, the Western romantic Because a really beautiful girl, on a gut level, will not want you if she sees you hanging out with culturally unattractive women. And a normally attractive woman will consider you a player or out of her league if she sees you hanging out with models. Plus, she will probably be insecure enough to imagine a whole scenario in which you've had sex with those models. Because that's what models do, isn't it? Ruin the lives of all the other normal-looking women in the world. So keep the girls in the photo at the level of female attractiveness you are seeking. Which means you have to be honest with yourself about what you are attracting.
7. Another bonus tip! The above lesson goes for typology as well as hotness factors. If you are seeking a sophisticate, include a gal pal photo with sophisticated women. If you want a granola chick, show yourself with your hippie chick gal pals at the local folk festival or volunteering at the organic farm. You get the picture
8. BE HONEST. So many guys lie in their profiles. In fact, it is the two biggest complaint hot women tell me, along with guys being too sexual too fast. Be honest from the start. Do it because good to be honest, it creates gain trust and it helps you authentically claim the moral high ground, which is where you want to be. Both for moral reasons and for attraction reasons.
As I said Adam is VERY experienced in the online dating world. As am I. He has created a couple of amazing HOW TO programs for all steps of online dating.
DO YOU KNOW THE #1 SECRET THAT BUILDS ATTRACTION ONLINE?
WATCH THE VIDEO BELOW TO FIND OUT:
