All right, I have a question from a guy who subscribed to my newsletters. Marni, how do I approach a woman when she is in a group and handle the group if they get in my way with her?
So he's been in a couple of situations where he had been talking to a girl and then all of a sudden, her girlfriends would jump in and steal her away. He always wonders why women do this and what he could have done in these situations. Well today, I want to answer that question because this is actually a very common occurrence that happens to so many guys constantly. And I think lots of guys get cockblocked by a girl's female friend. So they should know how to handle it and know the way to approach a woman when she is in a group.
I'll tell you the biggest reason why her friends may be cockblocking you and the number one strategy you can use to turn them into your biggest ally instead of your worst obstruction. So here's why women might cockblock you in the first place and it comes down to five possible reasons.
#1) Jealousy
As you may already know, we women can get a little bit jealous. I mean we all can get jealous. Many women do not like to be ignored and they especially don't like it when their friend is getting a ton of attention that they're not getting. They want the attention too. In fact, they might even be annoyed by the fact that their friend is not giving them any attention and talking to you instead. So to get rid of you or stop their friend from getting all the attention, they might jump in and pull her away.
#2) Protection
Women are caring and protective by nature. So if they see that their friend is talking to a stranger that they don't trust. Especially for a long period of time, they might come in and take her away just to ensure her safety and definitely check in on her. After all, while you may be a good guy, there are bad man out there. Men who commit terrible crimes against women so this is simply precautionary behavior.
#3) Biased Judgment
We're all guilty of this. As human beings, we can often judge people based on our own biases, and our own experiences. Women do this often. You have no idea what a woman's past has been like and what experiences she has had. She might not trust you because you look like a toxic ex-boyfriend she had in the past. Maybe you sound like him or you dress like him. Or maybe because of how she was raised or the type of media she was exposed to. So she might not trust a guy like you at first glance. Whatever it is.
The point is sometimes her past, and her biases can get the better of her, and women as a result of their biased judgment, might get in your way.
#4) Helping Her Friend Escape
One of the biggest reasons why women can come in your way with a girl is that that girl you like is actually signaling for help. So there's a chance that the girl you're talking to might not be into you and she has given her girlfriends the universal call out for help which is the “help me” eyes.
Okay, this is a super subtle sign women give to their friends when they want help. It's so subtle and so many guys do not notice it, don't see it. That's why we do it. But if your target had given the “help me” eyes to her girlfriends, they will swoop in and come to her rescue. And in this case, it wasn't the friends getting in the way of you and your girl, it was actually you.
#5) She's In a Bad Mood
Sometimes women might block your advances. It's because they're in a bad mood and they don't like you because of that. Yeah, I understand this may be very annoying to hear but it is what it is. We all get in bad moods and it's a legit reason why she might step in and get your way.
Now the good news is the solution to all of this is simple. Regardless of why women might cockblock you, there's only one thing that you have to do to avoid it. And here's what it is. You befriend the group. Befriend the woman. Charm them, make them like you, trust you. In fact, if the group knows, likes, and trusts you, even your target girl will be more likely to be attracted to you.
Now, this can play out in two ways.
Scenario #1 When your girl is with her group. If the girl you like is with her group of friends or even a single friend, approach them as a group. Never try to isolate the girl when she's with her friends. Talk to everybody, talk to all the girls, introduce yourself to all of them, give them some sort of compliment like:
- “Wow, you guys are all dressed to the nines.”
- “You guys seem pretty close. How do you all know each other?”
And engage the group, then spend some time interacting with them like you would with your own friend group. Ask questions, tell jokes, tease them, challenge them. Remember, time builds familiarity and familiarity builds liking and trust. And once you see that the friends are responding well to you, they're engaging with you, you can try to flirt more
with your main target.
If she's responding well and her friends seem okay with it, spend another couple of minutes with them and then try to isolate that girl. Tell her friends something like:
- Hey, do you guys mind if I talk to your friend here in private? We'll be right over there and I'll have her back in five minutes.
If you've done a good job of building trust, they're gonna smile, giggle, and say: “Sure, go ahead, take her.”
Or maybe even make a winning remark about you. Once they give the green light, you can lead your girl by holding her hand or putting it on the bit of her back and taking her somewhere where you can be alone and voila, mission accomplished. Her friends are now your allies, not your enemies. No more cockblocking.
However, as I said before, there's another way that this can happen and that's scenario #2 When she's alone.
At first, it might happen that the girl you like is by herself when you approach her. In that case, here's what you do. Within the first 30 seconds to a minute after introducing yourself
to each other, ask her who's she with. Who else are you hanging out with? If she says she's with friends, ask her where they are. Because they will enter the picture at some point. Either she has to meet up with them or they will come to her either way. You want to be prepared to mingle.
Now if a friend of hers suddenly comes in and interrupts you while she's talking to you or her friend looking at you guys talking, you don't want to freeze up immediately. Introduce yourself to the friend or ask her to make an introduction like bringing her into the group. From there, you do what I told you in scenario #1.
Listen, at the end of the day, as long as the girl likes you and the friends don't hate you or completely distrust you, you'll be fine. In fact, if the girl really likes you and is into you, then it will still work out in your favor. Even if the friends try to get in the way for some reason because she's going to shoot them away. She will go against her friends to spend time with you. So if you make her feel powerfully attracted to you as you interact with her, then she won't care who comes in the way.
So how do you create such a powerful attraction? Do it by flirting with her and spiking her emotions the right way. I reveal exactly how that works in my most popular program the F Formula.
The F Formula boils flirting down to a simple three-step process that any guy can master over a short weekend and you can then use a three-step formula in any conversation to create hot sexual chemistry between you and the woman you're talking to without being seen as creepy or desperate. So just check out the F Formula and turn yourself into a flirting genius. It will show you exactly how to set the flirty tone in any interaction, add sexual tension, and escalate things from a simple hello to a date, and then more. And easy practical steps that anyone can follow.
Thousands of guys have already used the F Formula to attract, date, and seduce beautiful women of their choice. There's no reason why I can't do the same thing for you. So if you're serious about dating beautiful high-quality women, have a look at the F Formula. I am positive you will love it.