It can be really confusing when you suspect a girl is acting like she's playing hard to get. Is she interested in me or not? Does she want me to try harder or back off? Let me dispel the myths about wether or not women DO play hard to get, and what you can do on YOUR end to build attraction. Read on…
“If women actually like a guy, why do they play so hard to get?” It’s a question I’ve been asked by countless men in my career as a Wing Girl. And while it’s true that some women (and men) definitely do play hard to get… New scientific research shows attitudes about this are changing.
This article shows how college-aged women made no attempt to hide their sexual desire from men they were interested in sleeping with. In fact, the opposite was true.
Women tended to act a little more interested in sex than they actually were… Whereas guys tended to show less interest in sex than they actually felt. So it was actually the men who were downplaying their interest, while the women made it clear they were available.
Why would this be the case? Well, one of the theories is it has to do with the changing culture around dating and sex.
Guys don’t want to seem too sexually aggressive, while women feel more empowered about their own sexuality than in past generations. The other thing is that men aren’t as persistent as they used to be.
Why?
Because as a society, we’re talking more openly about the fact that “no means no”.
So if a woman is showing signs of disinterest or playing hard to get, guys are more likely to back off so as to avoid crossing any barriers… This means a woman risks losing a guy now if she doesn’t give him enough positive signals that she’s into him. All of this makes sense. My personal take is that technology has contributed to this also.
With dating apps and social media, we live in an age of instant gratification. If someone isn’t interested in us, we can just swipe on our phone to find someone else who is. It’s much less common these days for a man to spend time pursuing a woman in the hopes of winning her over.
So in a lot of cases, it’s just not in a woman’s best interest to play too hard to get if she’s attracted to a guy.
Now, what does this mean for you?
For the most part, the signals a woman gives you will be a pretty accurate reflection of how she feels about you. That means if your experience is that most women are “playing hard to get”… The truth is that in most cases she simply isn’t that attracted to you. If she ignores your approach, she doesn’t want to talk to you…
If she talks to you but won’t give you her number, she doesn’t want to see you again or if she never wants to be alone with you, she doesn’t want to sleep with you. However, there is an upside to all of this.
If you’re getting any of these signals that she’s not interested in you… It’s simply a reflection of how she feels IN THAT MOMENT. Just because she’s not attracted to you right now… That doesn’t mean she can’t be tomorrow… or in an hour… or even 5 minutes from now.
That’s because her attraction for you is largely based on your behavior and actions… And if you change those, you can change how she feels about you. So what are the behaviors and actions that will make her attracted to you?
Go check it out and you can thank me later 🙂
The last female friend you’ll ever need,
~Marni