Have you ever tried looking for first date ideas on a budget?
You don’t need to spend a lot of money on a first date, and you shouldn’t. Overspending on dates is a newbie mistake.
(Note: Lockdown won’t be forever. You can still date during Covid. Just take precautions. Wash your hands before you eat, don’t cough on your date, and use common sense.)
For most men, the logic seems sound: “If I buy her a nice, expensive dinner, she’ll know that I’m a really nice guy and hook up with me. So I better spend a lot, because the more I spend, the more it will seem like I care.”
This sort of spending projects insecurity. Rather than generous, it comes across as needy and try hard. Just because a man spent a bunch of money, it won’t make her more attracted. Not in the right ways, anyway.
Don’t Try To Buy Her Affection
For women, we don’t equate the amount of money our date spends on us, with the amount he cares. Of course who’s going to say no to a free fine dining experience? It Doesn’t mean we’ll sleep with him because his first dates idea was to feed us Lobster.
I know men who have offered women all expenses, paid vacations to exotic islands before they’ve even kissed. I know men that rent a sports cars for the day, costing hundreds of dollars an hour in the hopes of impressing their date.
But no matter how fast your car is, or how nice the dinner was… if you don’t have game, if you can’t talk to women in a way that creates attraction, then it doesn’t matter.
What women are looking for in a date, is very simple. We want:
- Good emotions
- Trust
- Connection
Good emotions means fun. We want to smile, and laugh.
We want to trust that you’re a normal guy who we can be ourselves around. You’re not going to turn into a needy, jealous, controlling psycho the moment we smile at another guy, or forget to text you back. We want to feel safe to go on a walk through the city with you.
Connection means we have things in common, even if that’s our shared love of travel, Game of Thrones, or Mexican food.
Money Spent Does Not Equal Better First Date Ideas
When it comes to first date ideas, you don’t need to spend a lot of money. If you can give us good emotions, trust, and connection, you’ll be on hook-up road, without taking out a loan.
Spending too much money on a first date can make you appear desperate. Our thought process is like this:
“He doesn’t even know me. Why would he spend all this money on a first date? Maybe he’s a loser?”
We know because most women have been on amazing dates with fun, bad boys, who didn’t spend a dollar.
Make The First Date an Experience
The best first date ideas, are ones that bring you together in a shared experience.
The experience doesn’t need to be incredible, like bungee jumping off a bridge, or jet skiing around the Statue of Liberty.
It could be the experience of an intriguing conversation about great books over coffee, or watching a talented street performer at the park.
One of the best dates I ever had, was with a guy who took me for a ride in his old pickup truck. We went to one of his favorite spots, a lake, and skipped rocks. Then we walked in the forest. He was interesting to talk to, and funny. I felt safe with him, and we had connections.
So I slept with him, because I had a great time, felt safe and we had a connection. That guy had game. Obviously this guy made the right choice for a first date idea 😉
5 First Date Ideas… On a Budget
Now you know you don’t have to spend a lot of money on a first date, here are some ideas that won’t cost a lot.
1. Sporting Dates
The great thing about playing sports is they are pretty much free. They’re also an excellent way to have a shared experience, build trust, and get physical.
For first date ideas, you don’t want the sport to be too intense. No twelve mile marathon running or Muay Thai kickboxing sessions. Don’t beat the crap out of us please. Save that for the bedroom.
Some of my favorite sporting dates:
Frisbee
Just toss it back and forth. It’s an easy sport that anyone can learn in minutes.
Touch Football
If she’s a bit advanced with the sports, football is more fun. The best part of football is that you can tackle her, and vice versa.
Soccer
Kicking a ball is always fun. Just make sure to let her win sometimes.
Basketball
One on one basketball doesn’t cost a thing. Another great sport for getting physical.
Indoor rock climbing
Indoor rock climbing usually has free introductory sessions. A good way to use a little energy, without being too intense. Be a hero and catch her when she falls
Not as much reason for physical touch, but you can always race, or stop for a picnic.
Roller Blading
She may not know how to roller blade, but if she can, it’s a great first date idea.
Ice Skating
Like roller blading, but colder, and more opportunity to fall all over each other.
2. Intellectual Dates
If the girl is a bit of a nerd, intellectual dates can be great, “on a budget,” first date ideas.
Movies
Netflix and chill might seem a bit cliche, so just call it “Have you seen this movie?” The key is to get her somewhere private, like yours or her place, and not a movie theatre.
It may sound boring, but my city of Vancouver, Canada, has a huge, multi-floor library. It’s a fun place to explore. A guy took me there once, and we ended up in the cheesy romance section. We ended up making out all over that library while talking about our love of Tolstoy and Bukowski.
Art Galleries
Many women love art, and if you take them to galleries, or free openings, you can gorge on all that complimentary cheese and wine, while regurgitating your college art history lessons.
3. Relaxing Dates
First date ideas don’t have to be active. Here are some, “passive,” ideas for dates on a budget.
Live Comedy
You can have a few drinks, relax, and listen to funny people making jokes. This gives you more opportunity to laugh, touch and flirt than just watching a movie. They’re not that expensive either. Just know, the cheaper the show, the less funny the comedians are.
A Walk
A great first date idea is a simple walk. It could be in a park, a city, window shopping, or even the grocery store. There’s just something bonding about walking together. It’s a very human experience.
What’s a more budget and relaxing for first date ideas, than going to a beach, getting half naked and baking in the sun? Add a fun little swim, and it’s game on.
Live Music
For first date ideas, live music is a great one. It’s a passive activity, but can also be sexy, fun, and romantic. It also takes a lot of the pressure to talk away, as you can enjoy the music and still have a good time.
4. Food Dates
Yes, you don’t need to spend a lot of money on expensive restaurants. Still, food dates are awesome first date ideas on a budget.
You can cook your date dinner. This shows a lot of creativity, initiative, and talent. That is unless you’re a terrible cook.
There are also many street food options, which can be combined with a city walk. Just find something interesting, like street sushi, rather than hotdogs.
5. Social Dates
As far as first date ideas, this one is a bit advanced. But if you pull it off, it can be an awesome, and budget friendly date.
If your friends are throwing a party, you can invite your date. This will show, “social proof,” that you have cool and interesting friends.
A party could even be a board game, or a picnic. It doesn’t have to be clubbing, which can be expensive.
The downside is you may be introducing her to the competition, or she may feel a bit pressured by the scrutiny.
However, if you pull this date off , she can become very attracted to how you manage yourself in social situations. It will also make you more attractive to the other girls at the party.
Conclusion
Just to recap, here are five first date ideas on a budget:
1. Sporting Dates: frisbee or soccer.
2. Intellectual Dates: the museum, or an art gallery.
3. Relaxing Dates: a walk or beach trip.
4. Food Dates: cook some food, or eat cheap street food.
5. Social Dates: go out with a few friends, and bring her along.
I hope this helps you find some more first date ideas without busting your wallet.
Bonus:
The most important tip I can give you, is let go of the outcome. Have fun and express yourself as authentically as possible. The point of the date should be getting to know each other. You are the experience she wants, not the activity itself.
If you’ve had a great first date, and want to get the second, here’s a guide on how to have a great second date with her.
Good luck.
Your guest Wing Girl Amanda, from AbsoluteAbility.com.
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